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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
4 z& o$ Z3 g$ w9 W, [ o
1 W4 S+ X1 k! {3 o2 C7 Z" d2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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C8 i+ p3 {: M, s7 ^0 E, v9 f9 t男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”
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& E9 T. N' B9 p# V9 Q9 h3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。 v6 _, Q) N2 W' h9 c' X$ s! X
% a/ h5 W* C" `( z J3 o6 C老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。7 X6 g: G7 c, ]
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笑死我了。。。; W u: h3 C8 p" k
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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# ^/ Z7 } y* p5 k! n) Q+ R她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”5 F4 Z! v3 F, ^# G" f W$ m9 p
) f9 E4 v" m+ ~2 E& o" w恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，- |+ d5 k; s+ x8 G- A/ H
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”# }# r/ e9 }" B$ u3 p
& h( ]- ]/ u! j孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…8 Y- a: j9 l$ N5 N# q
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，1 Z3 g8 ?4 z- e* `% L. a$ Z% n
! I; t# p* k3 i, f我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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7 A% o$ b, j7 k, F7 B一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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@! x, Z3 ?# k, V' _ u7 w当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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" ^8 \. m6 u* h h' j" u我，无业闲人一个。$ v7 x% [; Y* D' `( V4 b3 p, F
/ M, I- B; w* S. ~: }8 H6 D q女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？# R2 L4 j% i; v( b
: J; O" @2 R) K; r# E9 [. }我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…8 W( F5 F/ V' G! A% f+ C
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当前离线
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