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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”* H) m4 @* ~( N, W
) d' R' ]0 n% T9 p! i3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。( T$ O5 N* N: ?& o
6 M+ c% {; C4 e& H1 ^- k老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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, A" i3 D8 |9 s. n, ~, u女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。
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笑死我了。。。, B2 l" Q' w8 C2 x7 b
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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1 J7 g6 J, l0 @8 n. n- ]可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!( Q+ g6 A3 ]0 a9 j5 E
/ a8 Q7 ]' _1 V3 X6 K2 H她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!- X% `9 r+ o5 T/ ]" o1 u
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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+ t* Q% X. [' z9 Q ]1 E恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”0 ^. O% ^) J5 K1 _, V G
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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# a$ f$ g' c# g ~! R一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？+ j" N2 h- u/ }4 }2 o- n
! f2 |% G! ^& j3 t, q0 V9 j我，无业闲人一个。- G1 s) K6 _4 w/ e, ?* w
5 ~+ } |* i2 C: A) F6 Y3 \1 `* ]女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？- u7 O* A" h# w( E, @
! _1 ?0 [& V0 \ o. v8 T$ A% Z% u我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。3 s& W' N- |7 k4 d0 [( R
1 q t! L6 G8 q6 X) Z女：滚她妈犊子，滚…+ a$ U3 @- T8 l. y0 p& u
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当前离线
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