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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”
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2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
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8 q8 g! P1 F3 e! L( A* B男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”! ]2 i8 K4 |* u8 L0 C
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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" { E/ n( y' X* X- }老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。7 n" r" ?6 Y: t V
4 l2 s2 @" R1 m. `* U6 H: M6 a B/ H女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。2 D; l& C/ b H- c% B
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笑死我了。。。
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W( I1 ~/ i& I+ l- ~5 F8 w4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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" p$ R5 F+ Z* b5 y9 W可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，1 X+ g1 u" X0 N; F: P& y! t
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!: `; V; w3 |' o( V; D1 H
7 o3 P, ?: F9 P3 [" u+ u% F1 Z( s晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”& M/ k) Z4 [& W/ ~: ^( i
0 r3 \/ T% ]! e! ~) U# d7 ^" w恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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- k3 t) K, W+ {! ~! T- J3 _1 f孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…) t# o2 n. Y; s% a
+ U' L, ?' {0 ~0 R! b' a- e0 h( \5 X# v5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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6 F0 L( c9 n, ~# \0 T* M我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。 B, n! b3 w6 Q/ g* L Q" S" m% r
# w) N: }9 j; t( g$ G" h5 m- H当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？# X# K. N( w: ?9 I; ~0 s3 J7 ^
! i# \9 q0 w3 j; X4 {) {+ A我，无业闲人一个。8 a) S) I$ \9 B& D
. i f! O$ A5 B' Z B; {女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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& p3 }; O3 r7 G5 P我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…$ L, P; a. E# j! h! D! |5 c
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当前离线
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